Boys, bathrooms, and buttwashers…I mean bidets

Yep, I’m going there.  Bidets.  Almost every place we’ve stayed at has some type of bidet contraption.  Either a sprayer, stand alone, or built into the toilet.

Traveling with boys has been great actually.  Need to change a shirt you’ve used as a napkin for the last 4 meals?  No problem.  The dirty one comes off, the clean one goes on.  Emergency potty break on on the road?  Slam the brakes on and we’ll find a tree.  It’s probably cleaner than a public bathroom anyway.  All in, boys are easy-peasy especially in the bathroom department.  Until…

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These things are the devil.  And very, VERY common in Europe.  They really ought to have child safety locks like the kind you can put on toilets to keep kids and pets out.  And the more I think about it, who thought these were a good idea in the first place?!  It turns out that according to wikipedia we can sorta blame the  17th century French for inventing this.  As Americans, we don’t see the logic in paying for, or installing a separate fixture in the bathroom, or using up valuable space and water. Either way, it’s a germ filled petri dish of a time bomb when you have 3 curious boys with you.

“Cool!  A tiny sink!”

“Nope”

“I can wash my hands in it, it’s just my size.”

“Nope”

“It’s like a foot washer or something!”

“Nope”

“We could use it for brushing our teeth!  It has a little faucet!”

“YUCK! NO! It’s for your butt.  It washes your butt after you go to the bathroom.”

“……..(no comment)…….(thinking)……(the wheels are turning)….. a buttwasher?!”

And there we have it.  A buttwasher.

 

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